Mr. Afraid to be Figured Out

Blogger: (nagbabasa ng email...delete: "i love hairy men"; delete: "I'm too sexy for my bodeh...") Packsyet.Kaya laging "inbox is full" ako eh.

Mr. Afraid to be Figured Out: (biglang sumulpot) Hey, check it out... (masyadong mahaba ang code name...MAFO for short nalang...kakatamad mag type eh)

Blogger: Check out what?

MAFO: It's the new girl...

Blogger: Hmmm? (sabay tingin sa entrance...) So?

MAFO: Ala lang...intriguing.

Blogger: (kibit balikat) She does not strike me as "special".

MAFO: Pero look at her...she looks...lost.

Blogger: Normal lang yun. Bagong salta eh. In time, she'll show her horns.

(Pagkalipas ng ilang araw...)

MAFO: Nakausap ko na siya.

Blogger: (nagdedelete na naman ng mga sensible emails...isssh!)

MAFO: Oi! Narinig mo ba ako...makinig ka! Tama na yan...pretending to be busy ka na naman eh.

Blogger: (buntong hininga) Nakikinig ako. So, anong pinag-usapan niyo?

MAFO: La lang. Nothing in particular...pero feeling ko, smart siya. Tapos asteeeg ng ngiti niya. I think her smile even stopped me on my tracks a while ago...

Blogger: (taas ng kilay) Do I smell rampaging hormones?

MAFO: (sumingkit ang mga mata) Ganyan ka ba talaga? Tsk-tsk. You're really jaded already.

Blogger: (kibit balikat...sabay balik sa pagbabasa ng mga emails....delete: "Anyone seen my headset? This is the code number...."....delete: "Clinic Food Fair"....delete: "These are the following incentives for July..." --- OOPS, wait lang...incentives yun ah...masilip nga...baka andun ang pangalan ko)

(Pagkalipas ng isang buwan...)

MAFO: Nakakatuwa siya! Ang weird niyang tao.

Blogger: Weird? Meaning?

MAFO: Meaning she's not the usual empty head. Smart siya. Tapos she also has a unique sense of humor. Tapos ang charming pa niya! O diba? Ang cool!

Blogger: (subo ng toknene) OMG...you're inlove?

MAFO: (kunyari shocked ang expression ng mukha) Ano bang pinagsasabi mo jan? I'm merely admiring her qualities.

Blogger: (kunyari naniniwala sa sinasabi ng kausap) Ahhhh...ok. (subo ng toknene) Sige, whatever you say, dude.

MAFO: Pero it's really amusing...to think na magkaharap pa stations namin. Minsan nakakadistract.

Blogger: (blink) (blink)

(Pagkalipas ng isa pang buwan...)

MAFO: Nakakainis siya! She's so manhed!!! As in hardcore manhed!!!

Blogger: (gumagawa ng SKEP...naks...) Ha? Who?

MAFO: Halerrr!! As if naman...sino pa ba? Eh di si Phantom.

Blogger: Ba't naman siya naging manhid?

MAFO: I'm practically worshipping the ground she walks on.

Blogger: (natigil sandali sa pagtype) Dude, that's sounded so gay.

MAFO: I literally look at her with stars in my eyes!

Blogger: (hinga ng malalim...pinipigilan ang pagtawa para di naman ma-hurt ang kaibigan)

MAFO: Her agents and even my agents are even hinting that I like her pero walang epek sa kanya!!

Blogger: Pare, may syota ka...may nobyo din siya. How would you want her to react? Fall for your charms and cheat on her boyfriend like what your ex did to you?

MAFO: That line of thought is way tooooo advanced from what I have in mind. And...that comment is uncalled for.

Blogger: Sus...baka naman ngayung final na ang decision ni Strawberry Jam na magpakasal kay Chocolate Bread...eh naghahanap ka lang ng mapagbabalingan ng thwarted love mo?

MAFO: Hay Lord...help me...no one understands.

(Ngayung buwan na ito...)

MAFO: (panicked look) Alam na niya...God! She knows that she's the Phantom in my life!

Blogger: Hmmm...well, hindi na yan nakakapagtaka. To think na halos buong Kapuso network ang nakakaalam...she's bound to hear it sooner or later.

MAFO: Anung gagawin ko?

Blogger: Is she creeped out?

MAFO: I dunno...maybe.

Blogger: Is she still talking to you?

MAFO: Uhhh...yeah.

Blogger: Eh di hayaan mo na. Atleast she's mature enough na not make a big deal out of it.

MAFO: It's a big deal to me! It felt so awkward!

Blogger: Uhuh...yes well....live with it.